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Devadasi
A Novel by Kasturi Sreenivasan

Chapter I: THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVERS (1877) It was dusk. The inner courtyard of the temple which was intended for the more important and higher caste people was still empty,but the outer spacewas alreadygettingcrowded. The priests, their stomachs hanging over their dhoties and their brown bodies glistening with perspiration, were busy running here and there, shouting orders to the garland makers, giving instructions with regard to decorations, asking for lanterns to be lit and warning the lower caste people to keep away from them lest they polluted the priests of God. The smell of burning incense and camphor mingled with the stale smell of oil and the fresh aroma of flowers and banana leaves ...
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Chapter II: Meena joined her hands in greeting and bowed low before her honoured guest. She was dressed in a simple cotton sari and tight fitting blouse. Devoid of make-up and the gaudy costume and the tinsel jewellery of the previous night, the delicate features of her face and the outlines of her beautiful figure showed to better advantage. There was innocence as well as dignity in her expression which her obvious poverty did nothing to hide. Udayar eyed her with keen and critical appreciation, in the same way he was used to appraising a thorough-bred Arab horse ...
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Chapter III: Meena listened to him with growing interest and affection. From him,she learned about honour, loyalty and fairness - values that had not been a part of her mother's tuition and were, in fact, contrary to her mother's ideas. They made a big impression on her young tender mind. ' You should be able to hold your head high under any circumstances,' he told her and it seemed an attractive prospect. Physically, they were well matched. In private she was tantalising and provocative, with all the art and guile her profession had taught her, except that now it was not pretence. Her love for him was genuine. When he went away in the morning, she looked at him longingly, but dropped her eyes in true modesty in the presence of others. And she waited impatiently till the evening for his return ...
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Chapter IV: ' And what if this man should leave you ? ' Muthu shouted. ' Are you married to him ? Did he take you as his lawful, wedded wife before the holy fire and before an assembly of elders ? He can walk out any time and you have no protection; no appeal. You have no rights recognized by society to retain your man. You have to fend for yourself and make the best you can of your life. You ought to get what you can out of him and then leave him if a more wealthy patron is available.' ...
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Chapter V: ' Well, it is not going to be Meena's life any longer' Udayar shouted back, 'and the sooner you get that into your head, the happier you will be. Here is hundred rupees for your expenses while we are away. Give some of it to the priests and there won't be any trouble.'
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Chapter VI: From a distance, he saw her going down the steps of the bathing ghat and shouted after her ! ' Meena ! Meena ! Come back ! ' Either she did not hear him or did not want to hear him. He ran after her and waded into the water as she was getting into the deeper part of the stream, caught the end of her sari and dragged her out. ' If you didn't want me, why did you come after me ? ' she cried. ' Death would have ended all my troubles ! ' ' Meena ! Meena girl ! ' was all he could say. A crowd was gathering and people began to ask what had happened. ' Come, let us go away from here,' he said. And in their wet clothes, they walked back to the choultry. People who saw them thought that they must have taken a vow to walk in wet clothes to the temple every day. The next day, they went and bought the wooden doll which had started all the trouble. ' I am going to call this doll " Kaveri " after the holy river,' said Meena. 'Yes,' Udayar agreed. 'The next time we have a quarrel you say, " Kaveri" and we will make up.'
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Chapter VII: ' I don't know,' he mused. ' After all that has happened, it will be hard for me not to see you. When Ganapathy came and told you had agreed to dance at the temple, my first reaction was to let you, and forget the whole thing. But it is not the same now. Since we started on this journey, we have been through too much together to be able to part that easily. We have become mutually too involved.' He looked up and gazed into her eyes. ' But I certainly will not see you if I have the slightest suspicion that you were thinking of other men.'
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Chapter VIII: ' I will meet the trustees as they wish me to do, apologise for going away when I should have given a performance, pelform any religious sacrifice that may be necessary to absolw myself, and offer to dance again. That is the only honourable thing to do.' She turned to Udayar. ' It was you who taught me about honour. So, you should not be disappointed at my wanting to uphold it.' Then she turned to her mother. ' But I will not swerve by a hairs-breadth from the path of virtue.'
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Chapter IX: ' No one asked me,' Udayar said. ' But a temple is a public place, a place of worship for all, not a place for ill treating a young and innocent girl. I just wanted to make sure that nothing happened to Meena, so I was waiting behind the Garuda Vahana,' and he indicated the huge flying transport of Vishnu used in processions on ceremonial occasions. ' She has given you her apology as well as a promise to honor her commitments to the temple. You can either accept it or do what you like with it. But you cannot insult her or ill-treat her.'
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Chapter X: The trustees, in anger and humiliation, had excommunicated Meena, forbidden other deva daasies to have anything to do with her and banned her from entering the temple. In practice, all this did not mean very much since she did not consort with other temple dancers in any case, and she was not dependent on the stipend from the temple which by now had naturally been withdrawn. Only two things worried her. One was that she could not enter the temple and offer reparations for failing to dance there. The second was that her mother might have nothing to do with her.
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Chapter XI: So Meena went back to her mother's home to practice her dancing and to prepare for the ceremony. Muthu grumbled. ' It is like preparing for a funeral. You are committing sati from an artistic point of view.' But decisions had been taken at a much higher level and she knew she was powerless to influence events.
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Chapter XII: Meena was now her own mistress. She lived in a respectable part of the town. She had a servant girl to wait on her and a brahmin cook. She was like any other young housewife, running a house, gossiping with her neighbors, going to the temple occasionally to worship, and with a few shopping expeditions thrown in. Her mother came to see her often and still harped on Meena's wasted youth and the opportunities these days for a young and talented dancer. But her grumbling had ceased to worry Meena and she took it with a good humored tolerance that was a sign of maturity.
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Chapter XIII: 'Amma, I hope I don't cause any trouble', he mumbled. 'Three days ago, I took a load of bananas to Sirumudi village in my bullock cart. I started talking to one of the ladies who was buying my bananas at her door step. She wanted to know where I came from and when I told her, she asked about Udayar Master. Without thinking, I told her about him and you, and how he had set you up in a nice house and how he spends half his time here and the other half in his own village of Achipatti. This lady who was listening quietly, suddenly started shedding tears. " What is the matter Amma ? " I asked her. " Nothing is the matter " she said. ' That woman cannot be happy at the cost of another's misery, she will surely pay for it." " Are you related to the young master ? " I asked her. " Related ? " she said, " No. I am not related. I am only his wife."'
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Chapter XIV: One day, Muthu herself raised the subject of Udayar, '. Don't you think he should be told about your pregnancy and made to take some responsibility ? ' she asked Meena. ' It should be his business to provide for you as well as for the baby.' ' I don't want him to know' Meena shouted vehemently. ' Do you hear mother ? I don't want him to know ever. If you tell him, I am going to throw myself into the well and end my life.'
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Chapter XV: Muthu had the responsibility of looking after a pregnant daughter. She had never reconciled herself to Meena giving up her dancing. When she found that Udayar was married, it gave Muthu a golden opportunity to take her daughter away from her lover. It was a great thing she was doing, for her tradition, for her community and for God. But she had not bargained on Meena being pregnant. This introduced a totally unforeseen and unfortunate complication. She had taken the responsibility for looking after child and now herself unable to do so. She could no longer borrow money on the strength of her daughter's charms. What was she to do ? How was she to manage ? she felt perhaps she had acted in a hurry and she should not have sent away Udayar as she did.
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Chapter XVI: He went to his friend Chettiar and asked for a loan of thousand rupees. ' Thousand rupees is a lot of money.' Mr. Chettiar said ' What do you want it for ? ' ' I cannot lie to you ', said Udayar, ' I am going away.' Mr. Chettiar knew that once Udayar made up his mind, nothing he could say or do would make him change it. ' Promise me one thing,' he asked Udayar ' Whatever you do, don't give up life and become a sanyasi. You are too young and too full of life to give it up.'
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Chapter XVII: Unconsciously, he found himself following the same route as he had taken when he went with Meena, visiting the same places and worshipping at the same temples. Perhaps, he was trying to recapture something he had lost, a mood he could not recover. He wanted to give up this world and lose himself in an orgy of Godliness, but it was a futile attempt. The image of Meena laughing, crying, tantalising stood in his way. While he was listening o a religious discourse, or to the hymns at the temple, he kept wondering if Meena had gone back to her dancing. And the memory of that first night, when he had seen her dance came back to him.
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Chapter XVIII: The sun was going down and it was beginning to be dark. The sadhu turned into a footpath between the coconut trees and Udayar followed him. Inside the coconut grove, it was almost dark. When they had gone some distance, the sadhu quickly turned. The man of God had suddenly turned into a brigand. He pulled out a knife from under his saffron robe.
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Chapter XIX: ' How could I trust a man who had lied to me about his marriage?' asked Meena. ' Yes, that is true,' Ganapathy spoke almost to himself ' It is true he is married in theory. His uncle made him get married against his will because the marriage was advantageous from his point of view. My master was forced to agree.
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Chapter XX: Early next morning, Ganapathy was on his way to the hospital. When finally he was allowed to see Udayar that afternoon, he shed tears of joy that his beloved master was still alive.' Oh master ! master ! ' he cried as he knelt by the bed side. ' Ganapathy how did you find me? What a wonderful man you are ! ' exclaimed Udayar.
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Chapter XXI: It was a period of supreme happiness for Meena. She had everything she wanted, love and affection, security and respectability, and the pleasurable anticipation of a child. In such events she forgot about her dancing. She was reinstated in the old house that Udayar had rented for her. But in view of her condition, her mother came to stay and look after her. Meena had long since forgiven her for lying about Udayar's visit and Muthu had reluctantly decided to accept a life of domesticity for her daughter, though she still spoke of the life of excitement and fame that Meena had missed. Even Udayar put up with the circumstances.
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Chapter XXII: ' Are you the husband of the patient ? ' he asked Udayar in somewhat stilted Tamil.' Yes sir, I am the father of the baby.'' I am sorry the baby is dead,' the doctor said. ' Perhaps, if I had been called in earlier, I might have been able to save it. But now, it is too late. I will however try and save the mother's life.'
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Chapter XXIII: After about two months, Meena was well enough to go for short walks. Her first visit was of course to the temple. She was still pale and weak, and a mere shadow of her former self. The spirit and the liveliness she had once seemed to have, had gone out of her life. Now, she walked down the street slowly, with her mother for support. People hardly recognised in her the beautiful dancer who had thrilled them less than a year ago. The priests ignored her. She found this anonimity strangely soothing to her grief. But suffering had given her a new dignity, maturity and self-reliance that had not been there before.
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Chapter XXIV: ' Yes, I want you to take her back,' Meena said slowly. ' At present, my happiness is built on the misery of another woman. To be neglected by a lawfully wedded husband is the greatest misfortune that can come to any woman. As long as she suffers and perhaps curses me in her prayers, our happiness will always be unstable. I can never have a clear conscience. I do not want to be the cause of another woman's sorrow.'
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Chapter XXV: Periodically, Udayar would go away and Chinnamma would retire into her room. Gradually, she learnt to adiust herself to the routine of his departures, at least she thought she was learning. Chinnamma often wondered if she should discuss the matter with her husband. But how was one to start ? What if he should be angry ? One night, when all the servants had gone to bed and Udayar was in a tender mood, she asked him suddenly, ' Is she so much better than me ? '
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Chapter XXVI: Chinnamma rose to go. ' I came here thinking of you as a rival,' she said. ' And I am going back having acquired a sister'' Think of me not so much as a friend but as a loyal servant or companion if you like, for I will never consider myself your equal,' Meena said as they parted.
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Chapter XXVII: ' I might have known you were up to some mischief,' said Udayar. He had been under the impression that Chinnamma did not know anything about Meena beyond some vague surmises. So, as they were driving towards Palayam, Ganapathy told him about Chinnamma's sorrow and her decision to go back to her village, how he talked her first into postponing that decision and then into meeting Meena and how they had met quite a few times after that.
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Chapter XXVIII: Ramaswamy Udayar was lying on a bench in the front room of his ancestral house in the village of Achipatti. His head was propped against pillows. A shadow from the doorway crossed his dim eyes.' Who is that ? ' he demanded. His voice was still firm in spite of his eighty- five years.
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